Relationships

Am I Ready For Sex?

Am I Ready For Sex?

What’s right for me?

Many people have strong feelings about sex and relationships, usually based on the values they hold important, and what they feel is right and wrong. Our feelings and opinions on sex are influenced by lots of things, including our parents, friends, other adults and role models, our beliefs, TV, games and films, stuff we see online, and religion and culture, as well as what we learn at school. It's definitely more important to do what’s right for you, rather than what others around you may be doing.

Think about it...

Everyone has the right to their thoughts and feelings about sex and relationships, including you.

Everyone has the right to their thoughts and feelings about sex and relationships. You may want to wait until you meet someone special before having sex, or until you are married. It’s important that you are able to talk to your partner, know how to stay safe, trust and respect each other, and know you can handle the consequences if anything goes wrong.

You may be feeling very excited, passionate and ready. Or maybe you’re under pressure about sex, or feeling worried about the first time. Maybe you just feel you want it over and done with. Whatever your feelings, think carefully about them. 

So how do you know if you’re ready for sex?

If you are having sexual feelings towards someone, you might also be feeling very happy, nervous, worried, excited, scared or unsure. You might already be spending a lot of time with them and enjoying kissing or touching each other. The only way to know how you both really feel is to talk about it, and be honest, whether it is your first date, first kiss, or first time.  

‘Am I ready for sex checklist?’

Before you choose to have sex with someone, ask yourself these questions:

  • Can we trust each other?
  • Do we have strong feelings for each other?
  • Do we respect each other?
  • Can we talk to each other about worries and concerns?
  • Do I feel happy and relaxed when we’re together?
  • Do they like me for who I am?
  • Can I have a laugh with them?
  • Do we both know what we want, and what we don’t want?
  • Will we respect each other’s privacy by not telling all our mates?
  • Have you planned how to keep safe using condoms and contraception?

 

If your answer is NO to any of these questions, you might want to ask yourself: “Is now the right time?” 

Good sex means no regrets

Your first time may wonderful but don't worry if its not. It’s only natural to feel nervous. Try to think about what you can do to make sure you are not going to regret what happens. It can help to chat things through with someone first. You can talk about all this kind of stuff at any

Healthy Respect drop-in.